I was born in 1965 and grew up in a small town north of Chicago. My parents made sure that my brothers and I went to church and Sunday school every week. My activities included Boy Scouts, sports, video games, working in my dad's ice cream parlor, I even had a paper route. Like many teenagers, I started rebelling against my parents and against God. I wanted to do things my way. I fought constantly with my parents during my high school years. No more church for me. I went through the same motions every week at church; stand, sit, kneel, stand, sit, kneel, fall asleep during the sermon, and run out the back door right after communion. There was nothing there for me. I felt like a hypocrite because I knew that for the next 6 days I was going to be drinking and looking for sex.
By the time I graduated high school, I was an alcoholic. I thought it was normal to drink every night because all of my friends drank. Even at this point in my life, I never thought I would become a cocaine dealer. My ambitions were to go to college, get a good job, get married, and live happily ever after.
In August of 1983, I entered my freshman year at the University of 'Wisconsin-Whitewater. I was financing my own education and working a full-time job. Things were going great.
In the fall of 1984, I moved into my own apartment and joined a fraternity. I was still working full-time and going to school full-time. Partying was also a full-time activity of mine. Every night after work, I would go to the bars to drink, shoot pool, and find someone to sleep with. I was trying to fill the void in my life. I knew that there was something missing but I did not know what it was.
Then one evening in May of 1985, I stopped to see a drinking buddy of mine. He introduced me to cocaine. I swore to myself that I would never touch the stuff, but after a few drinks and seeing my friends doing cocaine I thought, 'why not?" I loved it. I thought that I had finally found what I was looking for to fill the void in my life. I got addicted after just one line of cocaine.
In the fall of 1985, I was already getting into dealing cocaine to support my habit. Before my introduction to cocaine, I had money saved in the bank. I had credit cards and a good credit rating. I was working a good full-time job and I had just started a new part- time job, all in addition to going to college full-time and driving the hottest car on campus. Life seemed great.
Because of the alcohol and the drugs, I almost died a few times. I was driving back to Wisconsin after a Spring-break in Daytona when my heart started hurting real bad. It was not beating properly. I pulled over to the side of the road because I knew I was about to die, but God healed my heart. It was a miracle, but I still could not stop doing cocaine.
Another time I was in a high-speed chase with the police. I lost control of my Firebird and went off the road at approximately 70 mph. I screamed out to the Lord to help and I just missed a utility pole but slammed into a 6 foot wide oak tree. My best friend was in the car with me and we both walked away from the accident. The Lord came to my rescue again, but I still could not get off the drugs.
Then in the Spring of 1987, I got a drunk driving conviction and I dropped
out of college in my senior year. At this point in my life, I had a cocaine
addiction well in excess of $35,000 a year. I was snorting no less than $100
of cocaine every night.
Every night consisted of working until 10 or 11 pm. Then I would go to the bars until 2 or 3 am. Then I would have an after-bar party until 6 or 7 am. They would include a lot of alcohol, pot, and cocaine. I lied, cheated, and wrote out bad checks to cover other bad checks. Through all of this, I thought about committing suicide every single night. My life was a real mess. Many times when I was coming down off the drugs I would cry so hard wishing I was dead. How did I get like this? I never wanted to be a cocaine addict.
In June of 1987, I asked my mother what she wanted for her birthday, even though I was planning my suicide at that time. She asked me to just come to dinner with her and my father. Even with all I was going through, I still loved my parents even if I did not always show it. My parents and I went to the Hilton in Lake Geneva, Wisconsin on June 18, 1987. It was not an ordinary dinner, it was a Full Gospel Businessmen's Fellowship Meeting. I was thinking, "great, a bunch of wigged-out holy-rollers. What did I get myself into?" I was in a banquet room with approximately 250 people listening to the testimony of the guest speaker. He was a very successful lawyer who had fame, power, money, and a family name. These things were gods in my life. It got me to thinking how I really messed up my life. This man was sharing how even with all those things he still felt empty. Then he shared how he gave his life to Jesus and how Jesus filled the void in his life. Then this man invited anyone who did not know Jesus as their personal Savior to come forward and pray a simple prayer to ask Jesus into their lives. That night I went forward. I felt the release of all the sin in my life and I felt God's love come upon me so heavy that I wept like a baby. Jesus showed me that he is real and he filled that void in my life.
The Lord Jesus opened up the doors for me to go back to school. I graduated
from the University of Wisconsin-Whitewater with a B.B.A. in Marketing. God
blessed me with a wonderful wife. I now know that I am in right standing with
God and that I am spending eternity in heaven. I have the best job anyone can
have; My wife, Cori, and I are allowed to tell others about Jesus on a full-time
basis by traveling all over the world carrying this wooden cross.
Jesus loves you so very much. There is only one way to heaven and that is by receiving Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior. To receive Jesus, you must turn from your sins and turn to Jesus. He knows what you are going through and he will meet you right where you are. God looks at your heart. He knows where you stand with him and so do you! If you are ready to turn your life over to Jesus, he is ready to receive you. With a sincere heart, pray:
Jesus, Forgive me. I know that I am a sinner. I believe that you died on the cross for my sins and that God raised you from the dead. I now turn my back on my sins and I turn to you. Please come into my life to be my Lord and my Savior. Baptize me with your Holy Spirit and fire so I can be a witness for you. Teach me how to live for you and give me hunger for your word. I thank You for my salvation. In Jesus' name l pray. Amen.